Need For Art

by Barry Drogin

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To the Editor:

On behalf of every human who has been moved to tears by an opera, stood transfixed before a painting, emerged from a dance concert moving more gracefully, from a cinema elated or shocked, or from a theatre shaken or thrilled; on behalf of every artist who has devoted years of training, practice, discipline, frustration and anxiety to perfection of craft and maturity of vision; on behalf of all these people throughout the centuries and countless others whose lives have been changed by a work of art, I hereby revoke Eugene Feldman's [Letters, Oct. 8] membership in the human race.

A van will be dispatched to his place of residence to remove the television, radio, VCR, paintings, books, furniture, clothing, and all other aesthetically pleasing objects, and Mr. Feldman will be exiled, along with some raw vegetables, a solar blanket and some aspirin, to a nearby mountaintop.

If Mr. Feldman starts whittling wood into abstract or representational forms for no apparent reason, if he starts keeping a diary or writing poetry to pass the time, if he starts singing or clapping or dancing about the woods to keep himself from going crazy, we will let him back ... but never again will we print his arrogant, offensive, philistine opinions in The New York Times.

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Last Updated: August 4, 2007